Mumbles … Scream

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!  Ok, so maybe there was no ice cream but there was cake!  I missed posting last night as it was my birthday, and I was fortunate enough to spend it with those I care about.  It started with a few posts on Facebook, I got serenaded on the phone by a dear friend, got special gifts in my Animal Crossing game, had dinner and played cards with my daughter and her fiancé, and then went back to spend the late evening with another friend in Animal Crossing.  It was a wonderful day.  One of the best ones I have had in a while… but I think it was because I only took half of the new med I have been struggling with.

Today it was back to the regular dose and I slept off and on through much of the afternoon.  And I know sleep is not far away tonight as I took my meds earlier for a morning scheduled doctor’s appointment.  I just really hate the way this med makes me feel and it has really done nothing for my anxiety.  Today my boyfriend came to give me some cabbage to chew on while he was putting together a large salad for dinner… I saw his hand and was terrified I was looking at spider legs and freaked out.  Yeah, my anxiety is still alive and well.

So, I have one more week of this shit.  Then I will see my doctor again to discuss my lack of progress, actually I think things have gotten worse.  If there is not a change of some kind I really will scream. BUT in the meantime, I will remember having a good day on Saturday.  After all I finally got the elusive blue rose in my Animal Crossing game! 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – scream

(Picture from free image Google search)

20 thoughts on “Mumbles … Scream”

  1. Happy Birthday and so glad you got a chance to enjoy yourself. I don’t know if it is any consolation, but truthfully – I would not be surprised if everyone is struggling with anxiety these days. There’s just so much uncertainty, and the world is not necessarily bringing us all sunshine and roses lately. It’s not to make what you are going through seem small, but just to let you know you are not alone. I’ve been struggling and it is not easy when things just no longer seem normal either. It makes things that much harder. Sending you hugs and hope that you will find something that works for you. (((HUGS)))

    1. Thanks dear friend! I appreciate what you said, that I am not alone. I have suffered from anxiety issues for years (living 20 years with an alcoholic had something to do with that) and my new dr thinks I am “immune” to the medicine I have been taking so she changed some things… not working – I sleep half the day away and I think my anxieties are worse (partially due to the meds and definitely due to the state of the nation). I hope you have ways to manage your anxieties and I pray you don’t deal with panic attacks!

      1. I know we often feel we are all alone but as I have grown older (and hopefully a bit wiser) I have realized that much of what we go through there are others. I know that often our experiences or struggles in the past have greatly influence how we feel and how we see the world. So sorry to hear that you struggled, but I am also really glad that at least that is one thing that is way behind you (even if the symptoms are not). It is a horrible thing to go through. I do hope your doctor figures things out on the medicine front – and that perhaps you can both find ways to try to make things a little easier. Sending you the warmest thoughts and hugs.

    1. Hey, I understand. I am about a week behind myself. I hope you are doing well and you aren’t behind due to anything serious. I just haven’t been able to stay awake and alert enough to do too much. 😴

      1. I read something today that there has been a nearly 30% increase in people dealing with depression and anxiety now … personally I am surprised it isn’t higher. Take care and stay safe!

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