This is February and I am well on my way to attaining a goal I set for myself. I am trying to post every day with happiness and gratitude that I have encountered that day. There is always something no matter how small it may seem that we can be grateful for and even just a shared smile can make you happy if only for a moment. Please try to find those moments for yourself too… if you’re up to it I would love if you would share them too in the comments or your own blog. Being aware can really turn a day around!
I started back on a course of healing today. My therapist had recommended a book to me a few years ago and while I started it I never finished it. It is called A Gentle Path through the Twelve Steps and it is a workbook dealing with recovery for addicts and those affected by them… the later would be me. I was married to an alcoholic for many years and still deal with the occasional traumas that came with it.
I started out great with the step work of Al-Anon and thought I had things pretty well under control… but that was a mistake I made. I dropped the meetings, my sponsor developed health problems and could no longer help me and I put the book on a shelf and forgot it.
Now with my boyfriend drinking again (he drank heavily before we started dating but stopped about the time we started going out) I need the steps and the program again. Problem is my life with fibromyalgia. I am usually so tired after day-to-day things I don’t have the energy to drive across town (15 to 20 min drive) to get to a meeting at the end of the day. So I am pulling the book back out and starting over with it along with the help of my doctor.
I have reviewed steps one and two now and have been given the assignment of pages to read and work to do before my next week’s appointment. I feel good about this. I am happy I can work on this at my own pace at home. I am grateful my doctor is giving it another shot with me. Addiction affects so many people besides the addict… I heard it described once as a wet dog coming out of a pond and the water he shakes off is his addiction – everyone he shakes that water onto is touched by what he does. It is time for me to grab a towel.