I want to believe…
Believe in myself
And what I can achieve
Believe in you
And the way you care
Believe in those around me
And trust they will not leave
Believe in tomorrow
And the promises it brings
I want to believe…
Believe in myself
And what I can achieve
Believe in you
And the way you care
Believe in those around me
And trust they will not leave
Believe in tomorrow
And the promises it brings
Standing with a towel
Wrapped around my body
I wipe the mirror of its condensation
I peer through the foggy air
Straining to see myself
The distorted image faces me
Like half a shadow
Only showing part of me
Not the whole picture
It is like my own view
Not quite sure of myself
Not knowing who I am
Like in this foggy bathroom
Eventually the view will clear
And I will see my future
Clearly before me
I only have to believe
I blindly followed your words
Believing what you said
I was for once special and wanted
But they were only words for you
When to me they changed my world
Exposed me to new ideas
And had me believing in myself…
Now that you opened my eyes
Admitting to me the truth
I have to wonder
Would I have been better off
If I still blindly believed?
This is a post I am kind of afraid to write, but know I have to include it as a part of what Christmas means to me. First of all I chose spirituality instead of religious as I have never felt I was a religious person, but I am spiritual. And I take my spirituality as something very private and personal, so that is why I am afraid to bare my soul.
The saying Jesus is the reason for the season comes to mind every year… and I do believe in God and Jesus’ birth (although I have heard more than one person say there is no evidence that it happened on December 25th). I don’t really care when it happened… I care that we take this time of year to acknowledge His birth. I put a star on my Christmas tree to represent the star that lit the way for the wise men. I buy presents for those I love like the wise men brought presents to the baby Jesus.
I also believe there is a certain spirituality in the story of Santa… children have to believe in order to get presents on Christmas Eve. You have to take a little faith in miracle like behavior (visiting all children in one night all over the world, flying reindeer, knowing what the children want) to keep the magic of Santa alive for the children.
There is not a year that has gone by as a parent that I haven’t felt a great deal of awe at the magic of Christmas. There is just a feeling I get… you know one of those warm and fuzzy moments you can’t really explain… when it is late at night, the house is quiet and all the gifts under the tree sit in the glow of the tree’s lights. A feeling I get when I see a child, my own or others, open a gift and express pure joy. A feeling when friends and family are all gathered together however briefly it may be when there is love all around the room… THAT is the feeling. That is the feeling of spirituality at Christmas. A greater presence in the room. A love showering down on us all.
I believe in the spirituality of the holiday… of Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and any other celebration that brings together love and faith. This is a magical time of year. And I wish you all love, light and peace this Christmas season.