That Smell

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The repugnant stench

Of indifference hits me

And I can’t help but wonder

What about the words of regret

Where was the sense of loss

I though you said this is not what you wanted

Are you really not saying one word

Nice to know I was not worth fighting for

At least not to you

But to someone I will be worth the fight

They will respect me and show concern

Which is only part of what

You didn’t know how to do


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – repugnant

The Time Is Now

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I need to get through this

I need to make it to the other side

No matter how bad it hurts

Sometimes the right things do

I steady my resolve

And swallow hard

Take a deep breath

The time for the end draws near

My nerves are rattled

And there is no turning back now

I look at you one last time

And we quietly say our goodbyes


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – resolve

Now I Am Grounded

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Like a fissure in the ground

After a massive earthquake

You shook me to my breaking point

And I am left alone and damaged

But I can rebuild and find my confidence

I am getting stronger every day

And certainly more independent

With you gone I feel a weight lifted

Tomorrow once again holds hope

The future has recovery and love around the corner

All I have to do is walk the broken ground to find it


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – fissure

Me Too

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He has done it again

And with next to no effort

Quashed my hopes

By ignoring me again

We used to interact

We used to share

But now the world has become

All about him and

He can’t be bothered with others

Maybe that was always him

Maybe I just didn’t see it

But I am beyond playing games

Life is about me too

And I am seeing this through to

The end


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – quash

Mumbles … Extreme

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I knew what I wanted to do the minute I saw this, and I will get to that but first.  My life has been to the extremes.  I have had my high points and my lows.  Some people would think this was a low point as I am no longer in a relationship with my boyfriend of nearly ten years, but I feel a definite freedom and weight off of my shoulders.  I had been extremely isolated while he was actually here, but he was too busy with a million other things.  It was time to put me first.  And this past weekend he and his mom left to a small two-bedroom apartment.

So, now I wait for the extremes of depression and anxiety to hit.  I had a lot of high anxiety levers during the pack and leave, but it has been wonderful these last couple of days. I know the lows of depression will come though and I am doing all I can to keep them at bay.  I have a wonderful support group of family and friends who have been there for me.

Tomorrow will be a stressful day as they come back to (hopefully) get all the rest of their stuff they left behind.  Then I will totally free.

Maybe if he had listened to this song and taken notes things would have been different… but I doubt it.  What I thought of first when I saw the prompt… the band Extreme with one of my favorite rock ballads, “More Than Words.”


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – extreme

Endless

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She rested her head by putting her forehead in her hand.  It had been a long day and he was endlessly droning on about something she had absolutely no interest in.  She wasn’t trying to be rude it was just about the tenth time he had told this particular story.

She was thinking about how soon it would be over.  She had asked him to move out and he had already found an apartment to rent.  It’s not that she stopped loving him, it was more a case of shock over how little he had matured as the years went on.  Sometimes she felt like she was with a toddler who just wouldn’t listen.  He had heard her when she asked him to leave.  He tried to do some of the things she asked but it proved to be way too little and just too late.

She now sat down in her chair to … well, to do whatever she wanted.  The possibilities were endless without restrictions to tie her down.


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – forehead

You Ask, I Say

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You ask me what time it is

“It’s late.”

Is my reply

You ask me if I’m tried

“It’s late.”

Again I speak

You ask me why I am so quiet

“It’s late.”

Is all I say

You ask if you can do something

“It’s too late.”

I say with tears

You ask just one more question

Is it time to say goodbye

“Later.”

Is all I say


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – late

Faulty Feelings

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Even love is not perfect

The emotion can be fallible

Two lovers try to be as one

But life can get in the way

Problems and stresses

Outsiders and haters

All chip away at the relationship

Until the two have lost their way

And nothing is left behind

Except tears and pain


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – fallible

Matters of the Heart

Let’s keep it simple

No highfalutin words

No sugar coating

Just stripped down to the basics

Tell me the truth

A one-word answer

Yes or no

Do I still matter to you

 

I feel ignored

You barely touch me

You don’t show affections

Just a quick kiss hello and goodbye

Tell me straight out

A one-word answer

Yes or no

Do I still matter to you

 

You matter to me

But I will set you free

If you no longer

Want to be with me

 

Tell me the truth

A one-word answer

Yes or no

Do I still matter to you

Do I still matter at all

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – highfalutin