Happy and Grateful – Day 236

Seven months are gone now and surprisingly I am still plugging along with this challenge to post about my happiness and gratitude every day this year.  August brings the state fair here in Iowa and lots of heat and humidity.  It is the time to see the back to school shopping start with kids dreading it and parents loving it.  As I continue my challenge I hope you will take a minute to reflect on your day too.  You can even share your happiness and gratitude here in the comments or on your own blog.  There is good in every day!

It was back to more seasonable weather today so no windows open for me.  It still wasn’t horrible, but too humid to leave the windows open.  So I stayed shut in to my apartment most of the day.  This however is Thursday and my weekly visit with my therapist.  And as I was running short on sleep since I stayed up late watching the soap with my daughter last night… I did one thing that I hate.  I started crying during our session.  Talking about my grandmother and my former mother-in-law the tears began to come.  I was just too tired to fight them back down like I usually do in front of others.  I must have been teased or something when I was young because I have always been afraid of crying in front of others.  I know it is actually good for us to cry and get the emotions out… I just feel very isolated when I cry which only adds to the discomfort.

So lack of sleep, tears and then a bit of bad news on my boyfriends loan put the day in the bad day category.  We had so been hoping to take another loan from his 401K to get him a used but reliable car to drive and they denied it.  So now it is a talk to the bank and if there is no luck there maybe see if we can finance it through the car dealership.  Like my boyfriend said tonight… it is our turn to catch a break.

So finding some good in the day has been more of a challenge.  But I have to say there is always something.  And knowing we are struggling but we have a roof over our heads is ahead of some others out there.  A good friend of mine was homeless for a while so I have seen that side of it and it and am grateful to have a place to call home.  Where I can be comfortable enough to cry on occasion.

As for the happy part of the day. It was some planning coming through for me.  I have been thinking of what to do for my grandmothers 100th birthday and I think I have the card design in mind now, so I just have to put it together.  That makes me happy… creating things.  I also wrote a poem about a friend I miss terribly and writing always helps the day along as well.

I need to end this and get a better nights rest than I did last night.  Remember to find your happiness and feel your gratitude.  Have a good night/day!