Forever Changed

There can be no friends luncheon

No holiday dinners with all the family

Not an evening soiree

Or even a Tupperware party

Towns are shut down

And people are kept apart

But worse than all that

Is the realization that things

May never again be the same

As the population dwindles

And frustrations grab hold

Will there remain peace

On the too quiet streets

Or will this virus win

One way or another

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – soiree

Final Destination

Forgive me for leaving

It wasn’t your fault

It’s a defect in me

Facing your mortality

 

I now am contrite

I must be to blame

For you were ill

And I was insane

 

I did the same thing

Over and over again

But I was only trying

To forgive you your sin

 

The truth is you left me

Years before this

Addiction is a curse

That leads to the hearse

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – contrite

Mumbles … Ethnicity

Ethnicity … I don’t really want to write about it.  It is a group of people from one particular area – Germans, Russians, Southerners, New Yorkers, and so on.  But I am really not full of any knowledge about any ethnic group.  So instead I will talk about…

My new cat named Clive.  We just got him yesterday at the shelter.  He hid all night last night.  Slowly ventured out today and has even navigated the stairs a couple of times.  The little princess we already had is not sure at all about him.  She has hissed a couple of times but doesn’t seem too bothered by him.  He is black and white and camera shy so far, but I will get him soon.  He will hopefully help me fill my days with a little activity.  Especially when he hides, and I have to search all the tiny spaces in the house to find him.

The other thing is my heart is not really focused on writing.  It is breaking all over again as, technically today (since it is after midnight), is the one-year anniversary of my Dad’s death.  His birthday was the 13th and he died on the 26th.  I miss him SO MUCH!  Then out of the blue a friend sends a picture of a snow sculpture of snow sharks.  My dad wrote many letters to his shift when he would go on vacation and almost always had snow sharks in the letter somewhere. I don’t know if she realized it was one year since he died or not.  But looking online for the picture source I did discover there were two (classics I am sure) movies made about snow sharks.  One called Snow Sharks and the other is technically Avalanche Sharks.  I should find them on Netflix or somewhere and watch them in honor of Dad.  He was into all those cheesy B movies.  I’d give anything to watch them with him.

I have mumbled on enough.  Time to feed both cats and go try and sleep.  Good night!

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – ethnicity

Fandango’s Friday Flashback – January 17th

For some reason in my years of blogging I seemed to skip over the 17th for some reason.  I only found two I had posted.  This week I share the one from last year.  A poem about the loss of my ex-husband to alcoholism.  It was originally posted here.

Sharing this for FFF.

Haunting Questions

I wonder if
You still exist
Is your spirit
Still in pain
Do you feel
The least remorse
For leaving her
Without a father
Can you see
The woman she is
In spite of
What you did
Or is there
Nothing but darkness
In your afterlife

Devouring You

My best just wasn’t good enough

I couldn’t cure your pain

I tried everything I could think of

And everything you asked

It still wasn’t enough for you

She was “the other woman”

The one you leaned on

The one you drowned your sorrows in

And she was vicious

Little by little taking away who you were

She took you away from me

Slowly she ate away at you inside

Destroying your life, taking your job

Ultimately taking you away from all of us

I will never forgive her for what she did

I do have to find a way though

To forgive myself for failing you

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – best

Going Down Memory Lane

“Go to bed…”

 

“Go do your homework…”

 

“Go to school…”

 

“Go do your chores…”

 

Words I long to hear again

From the days of my youth

But Mom can no longer laugh with me

And Dad can no longer play with me

I went and grew up and felt the pains

Of losing them both

I never thought at the time

There would be a day without them

I wish more than anything I could

 

Go back…

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – go

The Final Drink

He has become unhinged

After another all-night binge

He is consumed by the fire

Of alcohol’s desire

Yet wait for a while

He has now lost his smile

He will weep in the night

Over his current plight

He cannot control it

The pain has hit

Next his breath will slow

And he will somehow know

His life is not his to own

The sickness has grown

And it will take him tonight

His family seeing the light

That went out in him

The night turns grim

Sleep dear loved one

The pain is now done

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – unhinged

On The Road To Disaster – Part 3

Part one

Part two

Part three…

Betsy had been driving about fifteen minutes when the lights of the town ahead could be seen through the fading sun of the day.  “See Mike, just up over than next hill and we are off on our adventure.

Mike reached over a kissed her on the cheek.  “This will be a great vacation babe.”

As they crested the hill Betsy turned and said, “You are so right.”  That would be the last thing she remembered.  She awoke in a strange bed and knew from the IV that she was in a hospital but how, why, where was Mike?  She slowly moved her hand to look for a button and felt pain shoot through her chest.  She finally found the button and pressed it.

“May I help you?” came the voice over the intercom.

“Where is Mike?”

“Just a moment Betsy, I will get your doctor.”

For what seemed like an eternity she waited to hear news of Mike.  The doctor finally came into the room with a big booming voice, “Well look who finally woke up.”

“How long have I been asleep?  Where is Mike?  What happened?”

“Slow down Betsy.  You were in a car accident do you remember that at all?”

“No, just driving up the hill outside of town, then waking up here.”

“Well you were in a very serious accident.  A drunk driver crossed the center line and hit you head on.”

“Where is Mike?”

“Unfortunately, I am afraid to tell you that Mike did not live.  Neither did the driver of the other car.  But the good news is you and the baby are both ok.  You have some cracked ribs, a broken leg and lots of bruises.”

“You can’t be right.  Mike never gets hurt or sick.  He is just in another room isn’t he?”

“I am sorry to say no Betsy.  Mike and Jerry Duncan, the driver, both died.”

She looked in shock as tears started to well in her eyes.  Then she suddenly turned back to the doctor and said, “Did you say baby?”

“Yes, you and your baby are both going to be fine with a little rest and recovery.”

Betsy burst into tears.  She just lost the love of her life but gained something more that would always connect her to Mike – a child.

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – live

Way Too Late

If there was a way

I could harness your smile

Happiness would be forever

 

If there was a way

To capture your unending hope

Dreams would always be in reach

 

If there was a way

To bind myself to your heart

Love would live into eternity

 

But the sadness of broken dreams

Crashed in my heart

The day you died

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – harness

The Case Against Frank

Dear Judge,

I am writing to you on behalf of Frank Nuthouse.  He was ultimately in the wrong place at the wrong time.  I can tell you with 100% certainty that Frank is not a violent man.  He felt his life was in jeopardy when he fired his gun.  If I can also inform you, he passed all tests to qualify for a state concealed carry permit as he is a law abiding citizen.    It was a very unfortunate that the child chose that moment to run for his ball.  PLEASE grant Frank clemency in his case.

Signed,

Julie Nuthouse

 

This is just an example of where our attitude on guns has gone.  When you pass the tests they should test your reaction time and mental health.  The required test here in Iowa can be taken online.  You need qualified instructors who can spot problems in potential gun carriers.  Human life is precious and there are no excuses for “accidental” shootings.

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – clemency