Like a lumberjack chops at a tree
You sever little pieces of my love for you
Taking me for granted and ignoring me
Why can it hurt so much when you are forgotten
And I am not as young as I once was
And I will not forever be here for you
I love you with all of my being
But I can only tolerate so many chops
***
Written for Fandango’s One Word Challenge (FOWC) – chop
I asked you for help
You were there
Just for a moment
To help me cope
Then you vanished
Leaving me alone
To fend for myself
Drifting in a sea
Of depression and anxiety
I was fine until
The current turned
And I was pushed
Far out to sea
Gasping for air
You didn’t care
You saw my tears
Turning away you walked
Clear out of my life
Looking back now
It is my opinion
You were just
Using me for
A loan and a laugh
I hope I was
A lasting joke
At least that would mean
You do remember me
Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) –opinion
The lump forms in my throat
The tears sting my eyes
I begin to see the answer clearly
I have become insignificant to you
Just a problem to work around
Something to simply ignore
An assumption that I will always be
At your every beck and call
When it is convenient for you
So don’t give it another thought
And forget about my needs
Push me into the corner
Forget me
Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – insignificant
With a vacuous look in her eyes
She weakly smiled
And suddenly looked down
Her eyes were growing
Move and more empty
With every passing day
An occasional recognition
Was celebrated at heart
But no longer held much hope
Her decent into the unaware
Has been going on now
Close to seven years
and the family was in tears
after almost every visit
Such a strong and intelligent woman
Brought down to an empty vessel
Void of facts and memories
…
Maybe someday there will be
A cure for this loss so many face
Until then there will be
Heartbreak and loneliness
In many at older years
For now just hold tightly
To memories that you have
For some day they may be fleeting
And you’ll lose those
You hold most dear
Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – vacuous
In a word
Is how I feel
Inadequate
No longer wanted
No longer needed
Forgotten since
I became a useless person
Unable to work
Unable to do a lot of things
Some days I can barely get through
Taking them moment but moment
Friends have moved on
To others who can keep up
Family doesn’t visit
Afraid they’ll wear me out
Even those closest to me
Dismiss me as unimportant
The only thing that I can say
Is chronic illness is a lonely life
Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – inadequate
Whoa, this is a big one. I have a lot of fears but to narrow it down to my “greatest fear” I would have to say being alone. Maybe left alone too early when I was younger, with a mile-long list of things not to do, I began to fear it then. Now It has become a fear of not having anyone to care for me, who will mourn me, or miss me in the slightest. Since my diagnosis of fibromyalgia, depression and anxiety I have lost 3 people who I thought were good friends of mine. A fourth has had very little time for me. And a fifth just communicates when they need something.
Not all of them could be bad people, so it has to be me, right? I have one beautiful daughter and a VERY BIG case of empty nest syndrome, so she is about all the family I have, and I wonder of my value in her life anymore.
A funeral no one would come to except maybe to laugh at my urn. Might as well sweep me up with the kitty litter… see what being alone does to me. Honestly, I know it is none of my business why people do or do not like me, it is not my business what is in their heads. I do still have four friends I can count on so I am not alone. It is just hard to not feel that way when I sit alone in a room with only my laptop writing when I can’t sleep. Some nights the shadows speak louder than I do.
Written for Fandango’s Dog Days Of August (FDDA) #11 – your greatest fear
Spaced out
Lost in thoughts
Wishing for you
To remember me
In the zone
Day dreaming
Hoping that I
Will cross your mind
Disappointed
Crushed inside
Another day
Without a word
Devastated
Giving up
Forgotten again
As you live a new life
Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – zone https://fivedotoh.com/2020/07/01/fowc-with-fandango-zone/
Photo by Kat Jayne from Pexels
A question is on my mind
Will you take the time to answer it
Do I even really want to know
I debate with myself
Should I ask or let it go
I fear the worst
But keep holding onto hope
I have been puzzled by your actions
There has been such a dramatic change
I used to be a part of your life
Day in and day out
Now I seem to be a distant memory
So I want to know
Do I still matter to you
Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – question
It sat in the corner
Covered with dust
Back in the shadows
Forgotten about
For too many years
Does it still even work
I reached gently back
Through the cobwebs
To retrieve the object
Wondering of its worth
And rusted condition
Does it still even work
I weigh the options
Of picking it up
And looking for signs of life
Knowing it might be too old
Too battered and worn
Does it still even work
Hesitation aside
I gently grasp it
Felling the faintest of hope
A gentle spark of life
Wondering if this is really love
Does it still even work
Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – object
No smoke and mirrors
No hocus pocus
Just me simply
Fading into the background
Overlooked again
Until I disappear from your memory
And am forgotten forever
Poof! I’m gone
Does anyone even notice?
Leigha Robbins 