Still

I take a deep breath

And think of the past

There was pain I endured

For year after year

But now that threat

Is gone from my life

And I face tomorrow

With renewed hope

But there is still

A wistfulness there

For there are days

That still shine through

With true happiness

And for those days

I still deeply mourn

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – threat

A Beam of Light in a Darkened Existence

She felt alone so much of the time

Ignored by those who said they cared

She sat in the dark replaying another day

A day trapped behind four walls

But then a voice from her past

Came back to her briefly

A series of texts from an old friend

Brought back the sound of his voice

And some feelings that had never left

Overjoyed by the thought of seeing him

The thoughts broke through her darkened night

Giving her hope for a connection

A way out of this choking loneliness

If only for a few hours

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – overjoyed

Within My Sight

Under the stars

I stare at the moon

Taking in the night

I inherit a chill

From the northern wind

And pull my jacket tight

With a deep sigh

I feel the hurt

From the earlier fight

I know the truth

But don’t believe

You wouldn’t make it right

And now somehow

I have to believe

In the morning there will be light

For when dawn breaks

I must be strong

And live with all my might

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – inherit

Healing Hope

Thanks to my past loves

My heart has been broken,

But I’ve got a makeshift heart

Put together with pieces of hope.

The shattered shards,

That you left behind,

Can finally beat again.

Now I see a future on the horizon

Where love may still grow.

All I need to resuscitate my heart

Is a boost of confidence,

From someone’s longing glance,

The brush of a hand against mine

Or a shared moment of joy.

He is my cure.

He is waiting for me.

Is he you?

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – makeshift

To Watch Or Not To Watch

two men holding red and gray crt tvs in front of faces
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

the first five minutes
are always the worst
murders, fires, death and destruction
the weather and sports are ok
but the fluff pieces
are always towards the end
the human interest stories
that give us a little hope
that mankind still has kindness

yeah I think I will watch
the last half of the news
the first half I can’t handle today

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – news

A Picture

Draw me a picture
Of a day in your life
Make me a memory
One without all the strife
I am clinging to you
And the hope that you bring
Find me some peace of mind
Put my dreams on a wing
For my day to day
Is filled now with pain
I leave it to you
Because this stress is a drain
So draw me a picture
Let the future just shine
I need some good feelings
That can become truly mine

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – draw

Good Morning

I slowly open my eyes
Taking in the first morning’s light
I begin to stretch my arms
Feeling the warmth of the day already upon us
Yawning I look out the window
Trying to find the birds whose songs stir my senses
I throw the covers off my body
Ready to face the day with hope and determination
… this is going to be a beautiful day

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – stretch

Mumbles… Attitude

Someone once told me to “have an attitude of gratitude.” Last year, all 365 days, I did a happy and grateful post every day. It did help me to appreciate the good in my life. It let me see the good through the blindingly bad. It is good to be reminded of that every once in a while.

The last week or so has been a little rougher on me again. I am drowning in stress and it is taking a toll on me mentally and physically. But I am still taking steps forward. I began a twice a week physical therapy for my back, neck and shoulders. One day in the heated pool (great for my lower back, I have done it before) and one day more traditional PT. This of course though adds two more appointments in a busy week.

I continue to see my therapists and doctors as scheduled and find little bits of hope in advice they share. My PT therapist offered many options to do gentle exercises at home (including looking for GENTLE yoga videos on YouTube, why didn’t I think of that?).

I have rearranged my thinking on my appointments and errands throughout the week. Instead of looking at a week full of appointments as taking up the whole day, I take those 4 appointments (at most an hour each) and add up how little of my time in a week they will actually take. It is much more manageable that way.

I am tackling one thing at a time and tying to be happy when each task is done. That is not to say there isn’t fatigue or pain (or both) when I am done, but the point is I am done. Up until the end of September things seem to be pretty well booked, so I am doing what I can to not get overwhelmed.

The good side of all of this will hopefully produce a little less pain, a little more energy and lots of things accomplished. Plus I have a couple of things to look forward to including a visit from an out of state friend in just short of two weeks. So today I am thankful for a day with only one thing I “have to” do and more time for the computer, WordPress and maybe a game or two of Words With Friends. How is your attitude today?

Have a good day/night everyone! (((HUGS)))

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – attitude