I Do, I Can’t

I don’t want to smile

But I do

I don’t have it in me to laugh

But I do

I don’t feel like sunshine today

But there is not a cloud in the sky

I do try to stay positive

But I can’t

I do practice staying calm

But I can’t

I do take all my medication

But still I am not well

I don’t want to cry

But I do

I don’t want to ache

But I do

I don’t want to bring everyone down

But my depression is intense

I do what I can to be happy

But I can’t

I do try lean on others

But I can’t

I do everything I can think of to be normal

But my illness always has other plans


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – laugh

Memories

You used to laugh

When Tigger would bounce

And tumble into Pooh

 

You used to dance

When Disney classics played

Over and over again

 

You used to come to me

When you hurt yourself

And needed a boo-boo kissed

 

You used to be my little girl

When did that change

And you became the woman before me

 

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – bounce

 

 

Happy and Grateful – Day 23

I have undertaken a challenge this year.  I am trying to find the good in every day by writing about happiness and gratitude that I feel.  No matter how small there is always something to bring a smile or make you grateful, if just for a moment.  Follow along with me as I dig deep as necessary and find the peace of the day.  Join in if you are feeling happy and grateful too – in the comments or on your own blog.  Let’s find some fun!

My daughter has been very busy.  She is filling in at her job as a temporary manager due to a maternity leave the manager took.  She has worked a lot of extra hours and has not had time to visit.  Today we managed to find the time to catch a late lunch/early dinner together.  It was so good to see her.

We had some good food, good conversation and each laughed… that was definitely needed by both of us.  She is always a bright spot in my day.  I think we have a pretty good relationship that goes beyond mother daughter to friendship.  I was always really close with my mom and wanted my daughter to have the same.  Seeing my daughter today made me very happy.  And I am grateful to have her as both a daughter and a friend.

Day 37 – 100 Days of Happiness

Two things today were laugh out loud moments and it is hard to pick from the two.  So I guess I will share both of them.

My cat has a love of laundry baskets.  When I manage to finally get one empty she always seems to be there to jump inside of it and sit.  She does the same thing with the clothes hamper.  Tonight after emptying the laundry basket, I pushed her around in it a bit – she seemed to enjoy the ride.  And I stopped her in front of her round track toy that has a ball in it to spin.  Next thing I know she is pushing her paw out the side of the basket to play with the ball.  She sat there in the basket nearly 5 minutes just spinning the ball.  I had to laugh.

One show that will often make me laugh is The Late Show With Stephen Colbert.  Tonight was no different.  He was live after the last presidential debates and his spin on them was funny.  Then he had a guest on I dearly love to see – Hugh Laurie.  The show made me laugh out loud on more than one occasion so I figured it was blog worthy.

Try to take some time to laugh… it can be good medicine.  (((HUGS)))

Day 31 – 100 Days of Happiness

My cat often provides us with needed comedy relief… today was no different.  Most all cats will have a time that they “need” to run at full speed through the house for no apparent reason.  My cat was doing this with a piece of string hanging out of her mouth for most of the run.  She would bounce sideways in the hall with back up and tail fully poofed out, then turn and run full speed again.  I have had 7 cats since childhood and never laughed as much as I have with this cat.  She provides us with lots of happiness.