A Letter Never Sent

My dearest friend,

As I write this tonight, I think back on all you did for me.  How you were there at the right time and place to help me deal with a great loss.  How you guided my footsteps through pain and sorrow.  Now eleven years have passed, and you are no longer nearby.  Vanished from my life for reasons unknown.  I grieve your loss as much as the other.  I did and still do care about you.  Hope you are feeling fine.  I hope all those dreams you once shared with me have come true for you.  Above all I hope you have found that illusive happiness you never were able to grasp.

I will not lament the days we have lost.  I will instead treasure the times that we had.  I would raise a glass in your honor, but alcohol brough me to that dark place I was when I met you.  Although there are still some lose ends in that story, I figure you have forgotten what we shared.  There were not many minutes, only a handful of moments of help.  But enough to forever grant you a place in my heart.

I remember you fondly, I just hope you remember me.

Always a friend on your side,

Leigha

---

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – lament

Simpler Terms

She went towards the mailbox and saw the letter sticking out of the flap.  She gathered all the mail and took it inside.  The large envelope held her attention and she opened it up.  The letter read like an unabridged dictionary.  Words way beyond her vocabulary, and there was three pages of them.  This verbose collection of phrases broken down into simple terms was just a statement for the drawing up of divorce papers… or the legal termination of the union of marriage between plaintiff and respondent. Why can’t it just say this husband and wife are seeking a divorce?

Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – verbose

The Letter

“This is just ludicrous Steven!”  She walked across the room and shook the paper she was holding and said, “You really think this is the way to impress a girl?”

Looking downhearted Steven replied, “That is why I showed it to you so you could help me.  I know it’s garbage.”

“Look Steven,” Karen said.  “You are going to turn her off with all this.  You need romance and compliments.”

“Karen, can’t you help me?  I really like her and don’t want to screw things up before they even get started,” he pleaded.

“OK, but you owe me,” she demanded.

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – ludicrous

The Letter

Dear Me,

I didn’t mean to hurt you

And lead you down this path,

But my emotions were all tangles up

In thoughts about the past.

I didn’t mean to jeopardize

The future you had planned,

In the heat of the moment,

It just got out of hand.

I could say it was a mistake

That won’t be made again,

But I can never be sure

Of anything again.

Anyway, I have to go now

It is time to face the truth

And hope that things will fall in place

Not crash right through the roof.

So, I write to ask forgiveness

And hope you will comply

Because I can’t live without you,

Signed lovingly, Myself and I

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – anyway

Happy and Grateful – Day 333

November brings a chill in the air and the start of the holiday gatherings of family and friends.  I can’t believe I am down to the last two month of my challenge to find happiness and feel gratitude every day.  I hope you join with me in the comments or your own blog in this challenge.  No matter how small there is always a little good in even the worst day.

I am still running behind… sleeping a lot and can’t count the number of time I have sneezed and coughed today.  I know sharing is good but my boyfriend could have kept this cold/flu to himself and I would have been fine with that.

Yesterday was a long day, but that comes with the territory of a cold.  I did feel “well” enough in the afternoon to actually get a load of laundry done.  But that left me fully wiped out.  I was grateful for that small amount of energy.

A happy moment from the day would have to be finishing up a letter for a friend whose birthday is coming up. I am behind with it too and the card will probably not make it there before her birthday, but it is the thought that counts right?

Time to see about some more medicine and maybe a nap.  With any luck I will be able to post again tonight.  Remember to find your happiness and feel your gratitude.  Have a wonderful day/night.

Happy and Grateful – Day 323

November brings a chill in the air and the start of the holiday gatherings of family and friends.  I can’t believe I am down to the last two month of my challenge to find happiness and feel gratitude every day.  I hope you join with me in the comments or your own blog in this challenge.  No matter how small there is always a little good in even the worst day.

It has been a rough night.  A friend of mine was texting me he is having trouble dealing with his brother’s death.  I listened and tried to say what I could to make him feel better.  I don’t know that it worked, but I did what I could.  I hate not being able to help my friends when they are hurting… makes me feel like I am a failure as a friend.

But this is supposed to be happy … and today was not all so difficult.  I did connect with another friend with a nice letter I wrote today, that made me happy.  And my boyfriend and I got our shopping for Thanksgiving dinner done and for that I am grateful.

Sorry this is so short, my heart is just hurting tonight.  Remember to find your happiness and feel your gratitude.  Have a wonderful night/day.

Happy and Grateful – Day 235

Seven months are gone now and surprisingly I am still plugging along with this challenge to post about my happiness and gratitude every day this year.  August brings the state fair here in Iowa and lots of heat and humidity.  It is the time to see the back to school shopping start with kids dreading it and parents loving it.  As I continue my challenge I hope you will take a minute to reflect on your day too.  You can even share your happiness and gratitude here in the comments or on your own blog.  There is good in every day!

Today was another nice day with the windows open, although it did turn rather humid as the night went on.  Since we live on the ground floor we need to lock up all the windows at bed time so we just went ahead and turned on the air conditioner to get some of the humidity out of the air.  Was just on the phone with my daughter and apparently it has started raining a little… wonder if it will cool it off or just make it more sticky out?

I feel a little better than I did last night.  Less tension in the house and that helped.  I got a thank you card and letter sent out to a friend.  I am grateful for some help he gave me and know a card can’t express my gratitude but it is a start.

Tomorrow the cable repairman is supposed to fix our cable… so tonight I was watching what was on the DVR in case that gets wiped out in the process.  My daughter came over and we watched more of the soap.  It always makes me happy when she is here.

I need to be up in less than three hours to take my boyfriend to work so I hear my pillow calling my name.  Find your happiness and feel your gratitude.  Have a great night/day!

Happy and Grateful – Day 220

Seven months are gone now and surprisingly I am still plugging along with this challenge to post about my happiness and gratitude every day this year.  August brings the state fair here in Iowa and lots of heat and humidity.  It is the time to see the back to school shopping start with kids dreading it and parents loving it.  As I continue my challenge I hope you will take a minute to reflect on your day too.  You can even share your happiness and gratitude here in the comments or on your own blog.  There is good in every day!

Still a little below average day today… in the 80’s.  We are so dry though.  It is drought conditions for parts of the state.  My dad was telling me somewhere west of us they measured a crack in a farmer’s field and it was about 5 feet deep… that is DRY!

I didn’t feel quite as bad today as I have been.  But I did one of the things that makes me happy.  I went to my craft desk and made a card.  Stamped, cut, glued and embossed… it was wonderful while it lasted.  Even the clean up part is good.

Now tonight I was grateful for some time to finish up the letter to go with that card.  Now all I have to do is print it and I can mail it tomorrow.  I love to write letters still, not enough people still do so.  An email is ok, but it is like the difference in a real book and an e-book… I like the feel of paper in my hands.  And the batteries never run out on a book or letter.  True it is impossible to read a book or letter in the dark without a flashlight (typically under the covers as a kid) but books are still a love of mine.  Do you prefer e-books or paper books?  Snail mail letters or email?

Speaking of books… I am going to do some reading and call it a night.  I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow.  Hope you have some gratitude for those happy moments in your day.  Have a good night/day!

Happy and Grateful – Day 189

July brings fireworks, picnics, pools and air conditioning. It is a time for those of us in the USA to celebrate our “birthday” and a personal time for me to celebrate life. It is hot and humid days and thunderstorms cooked up at night. I am continuing my challenge to find happiness and gratitude in every day. Join along in the comments or on your own blog. There is always good in every day.

Today was another day of doing very little except worry and deal with my depression and anxiety.  I escaped for a little in a letter to a friend dealing with the heat in Louisiana.  It was good to get lost in “happy thoughts” of a letter… I can sure paint a pretty picture when I want to… it made me happy.

I was also grateful the lines of communication are open.  My boyfriend has been kind of upset the last few days and I finally got him to talk about it today.  It comes down to his car troubles and what to do about it.  It is an old car, but it is a convertible.  It has been starting to need more and more repairs, but we have already put in a new engine, transmission and ragtop.  So where do you draw the line that it is not worth putting more into it and give it up?  He fell in love with the convertible but is now maybe regretting it.  We talked about it a while and are going to just look and see what is available in the used car lots and then worry about the next step.  I am glad he opened up.

The apartment is quiet, my boyfriend is already asleep and I should follow suit.  I am still pretty wired so sleep will not come easy, but maybe with my nighttime meds I can relax soon enough. Remember to find your happiness everyday!

 

100 Days of Happiness

I have once again had a night that got away from me so I will have to do two posts in one tonight…

Day 63 – I got a letter from a good friend of mine today.  She used to work with my Dad actually and I tagged along a couple of times to lunches they had together… now I am so glad I did, because she became such a good friend.  She is a beautiful soul who is strong, loving and afraid of nothing.  She has a wonderfully quiet place in the country now and shares beautiful nature photos and stories of the birds, butterflies and assorted farm pets with me.  Her letters are a joy, almost as much as she is.  She gave me more than one smile today!

Day 64 – Tonight has been a tough one for me for several reasons but I am happy I have words.  Words to express my pain and fear (my post on the daily prompt filthy) words to tell a friend I care (a small text exchange for a friend in some stress) and words to clear my head (my journal writing).  On days like today if I did not have words, if my muse left me, I think I would just curl up in a ball and waste away.  Writing can bring a peace that nothing else can touch sometimes… very therapeutic.