Every Single Day

I sit in silence and

I try to get my mind off you

But this is just like

Any other ordinary day

Your memories haunt me

I still feel your touch

I still smell your cologne

I still taste your lips

I am torn between

Wanting to remember everything

And wiping the slate clean

But today is just like yesterday

You consume my thoughts

And I wonder if someday

We might meet again


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – ordinary https://fivedotoh.com/2020/06/14/fowc-with-fandango-ordinary/

Photo by Nataliya Vaitkevich from Pexels

Bad With The Good

Beware the rose

It might smell sweet

But it hides a danger

In its thorny stem

It’s a lot like love

It may seem perfect

But hidden beneath

Is the ordinary truth

That can hurt you

If you’re not careful

Protect your heart

Don’t believe in fairy tales

It is not all beauty and happiness

The realities of daily life

Can scratch like a thorn

Happy and Grateful – Day 171

June brings warmer weather and the start of summer.  Hopefully it brings many ideas from my muse too.  I continue to write for my challenge to find the things that make me happy and grateful each day this year.  Please feel free to join me in this challenge with comments about your happiness and gratitude or start your own blog.  There is always something good to find in each day.

Happy first day of summer!  Now the days grow hotter and shorter.  And it was a hot one today.  Back near 90’s again today.  At least the humidity wasn’t really high.  I only had to be briefly in it as I went to the local mall to buy the dress pants to go with the shirt and light sweater I got Saturday for the wedding this weekend.  At least they are saying nice temps for that day… although they keep going back and forth on rain chances.  Last I heard it was a 30% chance.  No one wants rain on their wedding day.

But today was pretty mild and that was good as I was having issues with my anxiety.  I was shaking so bad when I went to try on the dress pants I was afraid I might rip them.  So once again I had to take a Lorazepam.  I see my meds doctor this week and we will see what she thinks we should do.  The stress is pretty high right now so we may just keep meds where they are.  I am grateful she is a pretty easy to get along with doctor.  And best of all she LISTENS!  I hate seeing someone who seems rushed and only half paying attention.  I am grateful to have this doctor – really all my doctors I have now are pretty good, I am lucky and I know it.

The rest of the day was pretty routine.  Was close to napping tonight before dinner, but my boyfriend came away from his computer and we started talking about dinner and I got my second wind.  I went to my Dad’s to fix him dinner with no problems.  And now I am relaxing with my laptop while the day comes to a close.  It is good to have just an “ordinary” day sometimes, it makes you appreciate the good ones more.  I guess my happy for the day was a guilty pleasure.  When I was at the mall I got a cup of pretzel bites with a little cheese sauce…. yummy!  I may only get them once or twice a year so it is not like I eat them all the time.

I should go read a couple more posts and then call it a night.  Have to take my boyfriend to work again in the morning.  I wish you all happiness and gratitude for the wonderful things in your day!  Good night.

Day 55 – 100 Days of Happiness

Today has not been a great day, but it hasn’t been horrible either.  It was cloudy, cool and tried to rain off and on.  Nothing great about the weather.  I feel the muse who visited me yesterday is no longer near by today, but I am not suffering from any writers block really.  I watched a movie with my boyfriend, but it was not any Academy Award winner by any means.  No long forgotten favorite songs played on the radio today.  It was really just a day.  I did talk to a friend, but got cut off early by another call and he never called back.  I did talk to my daughter, but she was trying to catch me up on the latest happenings at her work.  Now I sit in silent loneliness.  And to break the day down to the basic facts… I am alive another day.  But I kind of feel guilty I was able to beat cancer when a friend just lost her husband to cancer.  Kind of a why not me instead of him?  My cat has joined me on my lap now and maybe just that is enough for happiness… a purring content cat giving me unconditional love no matter what kind of day it is.  That is a simple kind of happiness that can get me through the rest of the night.