Mumbles … Dignity

The word I am writing for tonight (yes I am still sadly behind) is dignity.  After the text my boyfriend got all I can think of is death with dignity.  His mom sent him a message that his brother-in-law has stage 4 stomach cancer.  This news does two things.

I want to do what I can to let him know we are thinking of him but obviously at stage 4 a get well soon card is out of the picture.  He has always been a rather withdrawn man.  At family gatherings he tends to be pretty quiet and often will pick up his guitar and just play softly whatever comes to mind.  A friend suggested some kind of music for him to listen to.  I guess he is pretty weak but is now on a feeding tube and hopefully can regain some strength.  Maybe listening to some music would be good for him.

And then the ball is back in my court with another why.  Why does this man who dotes on his grandkids have to face his mortality so suddenly, but I had cancer, beat it and am still alive?  I guess the answer is that cancer is not fair.  Not fair at all.

So, back to death with dignity.  There are so many questions now.  Does he endure chemo to the bitter end or is that a different risk in itself that is feared.  Is he going to be one who just wants to go home and be with family for the time he has left.  But then again there is Covid 19 in the picture and in his weakened state he would be very susceptible to any kind of virus.

The next few days, weeks or maybe months will play out the way they will, there is really no stopping them.  I wish him the best and hope if there is a greater power now is the time to show some mercy please.

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – dignity