Who’s In Control

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It’s a typical night for me

Fear takes hold

Threatens to take my air

Ties my body in knots

And leaves me sleepless

Just once I’d like to have

Sleep find me easily

Tensions leave me relaxed

And breathing to be routine

I dream of that day

My anxieties don’t rule me

*****

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – typical

Endangered Species

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I feel so tired

Fatigue is dragging me down

I feel unwell

Just no energy inside

I feel uncertain

Emotions cloud my mind

I feel broken

My body is going on strike

~~~

If only there was a way

To squash these feelings

To erase the thoughts

To feel normal again

But alas…

I sit in my corner and wait

For the rare and illusive

Good day

*****

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – squash

I Am Strong – FFF #185

Why do you do this

Why do you tell me

Things that aren’t true

(You’re fat)

(You’re ugly)

(You’re weak)

(You’ll never be happy)

(You’ll never succeed)

(You’re a broken failure)

Why do you echo in my head

Nonstop every day

Spewing lies to bring me down

(You’ll never stop me)

(I am in control not you)

(You’re life is rubbish)

I will make you stop

I have power you see

I AM taking control

You will no longer bring me down

I am no longer alone

I have a team to help me

(But you trust no one)

STOP!

I trust me to know the truth

That feelings are not facts

And I have strength and hope

To live my life as I see fit

Without listening to your lies anymore

*****

Written for Fandango’s Flash Fiction Challenge (FFFC) – #185

WDYS – Sea of Darkness

It is happening again

I feel the darkness sink in

Everything is murky

Out of focus

And so far out of reach

Then the air starts to leave me

I can’t take a breath

The water will drown me

It feels like impending death

One last time I burst upwards

Towards the light of hope

Reaching for your hand

Hoping you can find me

In this sea of fears

Where I feel myself

Drowning too often

Hoping your hand will guide me

Towards the comfort of shore

And your waiting friendship

Where I don’t feel so alone anymore

****

Written for Sadje’s prompt What Do You See (WDYS) #147

A to Z Challenge – T is for Thurber

“Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness.”

James Thurber

I saw a post once that said dwelling in the past was depression and always looking ahead was anxiety but enjoying the moment brought peace. Having both I can see the correlation. Take the time to be in the now and find all the good it has to give.

Past letters …

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S

It’s An EMERGENCY

… a little something for the invisible hopeful masses

***

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Quick

Call the hospital

Hurry

Fast

My heart is erratic

And my head is a mess

I fumble and mumble

I must be in duress

It all happened today

When you had something to say

You spoke to me

And I felt the glee

Of actually being seen

And not by someone mean

So hurry quick

Which doctor do I pick

One to stop my pounding heart

Or one to pick my brain apart

I do not know

Which way to go

What is this feeling

I know I’m reeling

No need to push and shove

I think it may just be love


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – hospital

Alone

She heard the word

Alone

And she was instantly on guard

Why should she care

If she had someone to call her own

Or if she lived alone

Was it really so bad

To spend time with herself

But she had lived

A lot of years with someone

Her parents, husband and daughter

And the quiet was suffocating her now

Left in that silent void

She had never felt so alone and scared

But she was trying

There were less tears now

And more acceptance

If she could just get past

The feeling she would forever be alone

Maybe she could find a friend in herself


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – instant

Safety Net

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I feel like disaster is waiting

Hiding around the corner

One thing after another

Keeps going wrong

And you are still not here

Not where I can see you

Not near enough to touch

Not within my senses at all

I am trying to be strong

And weather this awful storm

But I would feel much safer

Wrapped up in your arms


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – disaster

Too Much

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The people

The noise

The unending conversations

It was like

A sensory overload

Too much talk

Too much sparkle

Too much of the holidays

She excused herself

And left the party

Taciturn for the rest of the month

In an attempt to

Recover some peace of mind


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – taciturn

Shine A Light This Way

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Asking for help is hard

Admitting I need a hand

Gets easily caught in my throat

People tell me I am strong

Then why do I feel so weak

The day can turn in the blink of an eye

Leaving me afraid of my shadow

Fear overwhelming me

And I am left searching

The small list of friends I have

And who I think can assist me

From letting the darkness take over

Will you give of your time today

Or am I as alone as I feel


Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – assist