Hang On Tight

She drove through town in a haphazard fashion. Her life was so complicated and she was just trying to get to a place of peace, anyplace without the headaches of her life. She found herself at a local park and pulled into a parking space by the creek.

She stood on the bridge and breathed deep the crisp fall air. Her relationship was in tatters, her Mom was sick and work had become an exercise in trying to control her anxieties.

Tomorrow she was seeing a new therapist. It had to help… she was at the end of her rope.

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – haphazard

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Round One

In this corner
the defendant
weighing down my life
is depression
In the other corner
the opponent
bouncing around
is anxiety
Hitting below the belt is fine,
use every trick in the book
Now come out fighting
trying to take control
of this shell of a body

This daily struggle
goes on in my head
and I just wait to see
who will have superiority
and how bad my day will be
or if both will cause a TKO
and in bed I am meant to stay

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – opponent

My Wish

If I had one wish
I would want this…
To be comfortable
In my own skin
Take the pain away
Take away the fears
Leave anxiety behind
And shake the depression
No more casting doubt
And shadows upon myself
Living with hope
And not inward hate
A chance to stop
Always blaming me
For maybe just this once
I could be happy
Being me

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – comfortable

Instinct Overload

It sneaks up on me
In the middle of the day
It creeps in the shadows
Late at night
It twists my insides
Into knots of pain
It grasps my heart
And won’t let go
It distorts my view
Of a normal day
It destroys my peace
With its wild assumptions
… we need fear
As it’s a basic instinct
But can’t it just go away
If only for a day

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – fear

Will You? (FOWC)

Will you continue to be my friend…
When I forget to call
When I miss your birthday
When I can’t come to dinner
Will you continue to be my friend…
When I have a panic attack at your house
When I cry over the phone
When I reach out in desperation
Will you continue to be my friend…
When I can’t leave my house anymore
When I anxiety makes me physically ill
When I stay in bed for weeks from depression
Will you continue to be my friend?

 

Written for Fandango’s One-Word Challenge (FOWC) – continue

Silent Questions

The awkward silence that follows
My sincere I love you…
The awkward silence eats me alive
Did I do something wrong…
The awkward silence slowly chokes me
Should I have never said a word…
The awkward silence fills me with anxiety
It has to be my fault…
The awkward silence forces me to think
You never loved me to begin with….

In The Perceived Spotlight

rapid heartbeat
Shallow breaths
The world turns grey
Muted sounds
Everyone stares
The walls are closing in
I can’t catch my breath
My heart beats like a drum
No more focusing on things
Everyone stares
The world is hazy
I feel like I’m dying
No air to breathe
I wish for peace
Everyone stares
Look away
I feel my world collapsing
This will be my end
No one to help me
And still everyone stares